Friday, January 25, 2008


A couple of hours ago, I dropped my eldest off at church for his trip to the mountains. I kept calling it a ski trip but I have been repeatedly informed that he was, in fact, not going skiing. No, he was going snow-boarding. Duh... I am so 1980s!

I've had mixed feelings about this trip. There is, of course, the joy of having one less child (a teen none the less) to argue with encourage for a few days. But this is mixed with a just as expected sense of concern. I've never been big on buses to begin with (let alone long trips, driving in the rain, or - even more notably - driving in the snow), but worrying is just part of a mother's job when one of her children heads off on such an adventure. I'm sure he's going to be just fine. Even though he's only been snow boarding once before. Just fine.

I'm also confident that the pressure bearing down on my chest and the slight possibility of tears will pass soon too. And you know how there's usually that one friend you can call who always knows just what to say when you're feeling a bit off? Well that friend should really not leave her cell phone at home when you might need her. Just saying.

Anyway, the anxiety I felt as I drove away was not really about the trip or the bus or the skiing, oops, snow boarding. No, it's more about his person... his heart... his vulnerability in life... his, well, humanity. Do you know what I mean? Don't you just wish you could take their hearts and protect them.. to keep them innocent and safe, brave and secure? That's where I catch myself worrying... not so much about what could happen, but how it will affect their heart, their attitude, their character. And there's just nothing I can do to fix any of that. So I pray... because I know God can work where I can't.

Well, since I'm not an emotional person and, in fact, believe that emotions are best kept stuffed way down inside where they don't have to be dealt with (unless of course you are sharing them in the privacy of the www), I'll move on.

I came across this Pantone spring color forecast card this morning and am so excited that I will now be "in the know".

To tell the truth, with the exception of a few of the colors, this selection doesn't do much for me.

But it did remind me of something.

Check it out...

The somewhat hideous sweater I picked up at Target for $3.48 yesterday. (What? I'm just gonna wear it around the house anyway.)

What do you know... being in style doesn't have to be expensive! Look out spring, here I come!


Ruthanne (in Seattle) said...

Hang in there Tammy! I know the feelings you share on the blog. . . things don't come easy for the mothers do they? I hope he has a wonderful time and the snowboarding is fun!

knitknerd said...

I can so feel what you are saying about wanting to "protect the hearts" of your kids - will be praying for your son.

Michelle said...

I'll be praying for your little man! Just remember Proverbs 22:6, and hopefully that will bring you some comfort that he will be fine!

What's wrong with the Target sweater? I'd wear it out of the house:)

km said...

I'll be praying for this weekend. I like remembering a Jim Elliot (or maybe it was Elizabeth)saying, "The safest place to be is in the center of God's will." I know HE's watching over your little one.

Angelika said...

I'm sure he'll be fine and so will you. Just distract yourself with some more knitting and I'm sure the other four won't let you miss him too much.

Auntie Pudentaine said...

The color card with the sweater is hilarious!

Is he back safe and sound? I hope it all went well...and I know what you mean about worrying about their hearts. I work with teens, and I love them so much, but they are in such a transitional phase. Still so young but also making decisions that can have life long consequences.

Julie said...

Amazing the way the colors are the same. You are right on the cutting edge there, aren't cha?!

Julie said...

Oh, and THIS was the place I was trying to leave a comment, but blogger wouldn't let me sign in last week :(
You know, the one I told you about , that he is safe is God's hands today no less than yesterday. He will be safe there tomorrow as well.